current mood: aggravated
COME ON YOU PIECE OF SHIT LET ME POST
COME ON YOU PIECE OF SHIT LET ME POST
X-Posting from DA/FA
I haven't posted a journal in a few months so heres what is going down with me as of late.
I can't remember if I mentioned it here or not but I was denied disability and medicaid after my court hearing about it. Basically, my age, my shitty doctor saying "I don't know whats wrong with her so shes fine.", and me slipping up and said I had gone on vacation screwed me over. I'm pretty sure even if I had lied and said I hadn't been on vacation lately, I would have been denied anyways.
I really don't want to reapply because its just emotionally draining and I'm pretty sure that they'll never accept my case but I'm probably going to anyways, just so my dad can claim me as a dependant on his taxes or whatever.
My health has been so-so lately. Nothing terrible but nothing great either. It would probably be better if it weren't so hot out.
The air conditioner in my house broke down last summer so we've been having to deal with 100+ degree temperatures without any real relief. I took my dad out to eat three days in a row just so I could get out of the hotbox house for a few hours. However, my boyfriend bought me and my dad a portable air conditioner. It's helping a lot. At least one room is livable now!
On Sunday, we had to put my old dog to sleep. She was 16 years old and her back legs had gone out. She could stand and move around a bit if we got her up on her feet but that was about it. She didn't wanna eat or drink much so it was time. It's so weird because this is the first time in my life I haven't had a dog around. It's just me, my dad and our two ferrets now. Oh and my overwhelming collection of plush toys but they might not count.
Some good news though, my dad finally went back to work this week after being unemployed for almost 2 and a half years. He is also immediatly getting overtime as well. This will help us catch up a lot. We've been basically living off the charity of my friends and my dad's best friend since the beginning of the year as we have had 0 income. My dad tried to apply for schooling-for-unemployment type of thing so he could at least get a few more months of unemployment money, but he got screwed over. I don't really know of the details but basically his case worker or whatever took too long to do anything so we got punished for it. Owns.
As for other going ons, my boyfriend got me a 3DS at launch. I don't have it updated or connected to the internet yet (trying to keep it at its launch firmware so its easier to mod/pirate later) so no friend codes for people, sorry. I only have Nintendogs for it right now but I really want OoT 3DS! Hopefully I can get that this month.
I finished Pokemon White quite a while ago. I kind of want to battle some folk, whether it's gen 4 or gen 5 games. If you wanna battle me, hit me up on IM or over twitter or something.
Been trying to draw a bit more lately, making new characters as well, but I'm posting most of my stuff to my tumblr as its mostly sketches and doodles. Here is a link to my art tag. Warning, some NSFW doodles there.
Um that's about it I guess! If you have anything to ask, go ahead.
got denied disability again
not surprised, just sucks.
my shitty doctor fucked me over mostly. that and me being truthful and saying i went on vacation lol.
looks like i gotta go to a mental health clinic and claim im crazy for it i guess!!
got 60 days to appeal.
got that guy refunded, got my steam account back, was unsuspended early on gpx+
uh i think my lj paid account is running out soon. not sure if ill get another one, i use twitter and tumblr a lot more now. i just dont have a lot to say most of the time.
trying to get back into drawing. what a scrub hobby
oh and um if anyone here has my cell number, dont call it or text it. my service got cut off for now because we havent had money to pay the bill lol
dont even know why i have a cell phone. i dont use it. talking on da phone SUX
my disability court date is coming up in a few weeks oh man oh man hope i get a big fat check so then i can buy all the day pornos
well i got unsuspended from eggsite early. guess they read my ticket
but now my steam account is disabled for whatever fucking reason. didn't even send me an email why. so its either because.
1. someone tried to hijack my shit
2. theyre pissy because i logged into my boyfriends computer a few weeks back. which is stupid because they have STEAM CLOUD just for this reason.
i sent steam support a trouble ticket about it so i hope this gets fixed. this is retarded.
they suspended me because they thought i was harassing my friend when i was just joking with her
she had an art thread up in the forums, so i told her if she “doesnt draw pregnant vegeta shes a pub scrub nub”.
and i left a comment on her profile saying “shut up, bitch”
both are inside jokes (more so the last one).
oddly enough, they deleted my thread post, but not the comment i left on her profile, which is more offensive, unless someone really doesnt like being called a scrub lmao
its only a two day suspension so its not so bad. i sent them a clarification via their contact form though.
Hello LJ I have not used you seriously in some time.
Last few days have blown ass, for lack of better words.
Yesterday (well I guess two days ago now at the time of writing this), a close family friend of ours died. A week before, she had an accident and hit her head really hard on some concrete. She had a really bad concussion with some hemorrhaging. The day I visited her she was doing okay. I mean she was still in a lot of pain and such but she wasn't talking gibberish like she was the day before. The day after I visited the gibberish speak came back and she couldn't eat or walk at all. After that apparently she stopped breathing so she was put on a respirator. Later on she became brain dead and had the plug pulled on her when they determined none of her organs could be donated. Apparently she threw a major blood cot in either her heart or lungs which caused her to stop breathing. Honestly, it could have been anything, she wasn't exactly healthy to begin with. She's been diabetic since she was 12 and had breast cancer at 20 (I think she was around 60ish).
Honestly she was closer to me and my dad than our actual family is so that was really hard on us. I think one of the most depressing parts of this was, not only was it so close to Christmas, but apparently she died on the day or day before of her and her husband's anniversary. Deserving-of is an unmeasurable human concept whereas luck is an abstract concept, so I don't know what to call this except for heart-breaking.
Then we have the issue of me and my dad having zero-income for at least three months because 1. My dads been laid off for almost two years now and the unemployment agency decided to screw him over; and 2. I am currently not getting any disability income and my court date is not until mid-February of next year. We haven't been able to make a house payment in almost three months and you know what that means, funny foreclosure joke. Fortunately, my dad was finally able to sell his motorcycle today (for less than he wanted but beggars can't be choosers) and we were able to get caught up on the house payments. We're still not in a very good situation but it's a bit out of the shit-lake right now.
I also haven't been feeling super well lately. I keep getting low grade fevers out of no where. I guess it's just a symptom of my autoimmune disorder. Then I keep having the random wake-up-and-I-can't-fucking-pee or I-really-have-to-strain-to-pee issue that I get sometimes. I don't know if its attributed to stress/anxiety or its also just some random ass symptom of whatever I have but it's really annoying and I would like it to stop thank you. Also of course the usual stomach/gut issues but I think most of that will go away once I take a big shit and get de-stressed. Should probably cut down on the fast food too because that probably doesn't help but I get such bad cravings for chicken nuggets you have no idea.
I was able to go shopping for some clothes and other stuff for my trip to England at least. I still need to try to see my lawyer before I go to at least drop off some packet of forms. I need to talk to a doctor to renew a prescription too but I don't think that's going to happen because I am so goddamn awful with phone calls. In before my dad makes the calls for me and gets mad at me for being a big baby over a goddamn phone call. No dad, I know they are not going to crawl through the phone and kick my ass, but saying that doesn't make my irrational fear of it go away!! Put a spider on a phone floating in the middle of a deep pool of water and tell me the make a phone call and watch how hard I'll cry. HELLO I AM PATHETIC.
Anyways I do hope my dad calls (lmfao) my doctor and that my doctor will just renew the prescription over the phone so I don't have to see him because I don't think he can fit me in within 2 days especially on X-mas hurr. If not, oh well I guess, it's just prednisone. I am supposed to be taking it however at the same time I really cannot be taking it on a constant basis because it will basically fucking give me diabetes, which I am prone to in the first place! I have a few pills of it left over so I can take it when I feel I need to. At least I have plenty of painkillers euhehe.
In better news, I'll be leaving for England early morning on the 26th and will be there till the 17th. I didn't get to go last year like I usually do and also missed out on my birthday trip up to Washington for PAINFURREST (yes I am still pissed off at that) due to being so wiped out after being in the hospital and getting chemotherapy. My dad is still nervous about me going because this time because I am not exactly in tip-top shape but lets be honest, I am not going to be feeling great until I get proper treatment, which I won't get until I get a proper diagnosis from a proper doctor. Hasn't happened yet folks!
Once again I'll most likely be restricting my IM contacts to my 'secret' alt MSN and AIM accounts like I usually do, so if you don't have those and wish to contact me, send me a PM and I'll probably share it with you. I -might- be on skype or I might be using my boyfriend's skype account, I'm not sure yet. I'll be on one or the other for sure because that's what I'll be using to talk to my dad with (overseas phone calling is too expensive and e-mail is mad gay).
If you live in England and would really seriously like to try to meet up with me, drop me a note or something and I might try to arrange some kind of meet up -if I am healthy enough-. If you are not serious about it and are most likely gonna flake out at the last second, then do not waste my time like the last few times I tried to do this :)! I'm at least going to try to take a day trip or something up to London so if you're there, let's bro-fist.
Um that's about it I guess!
Merry Christmas ya wieners.
P.S. For those who keep asking what I'd like for Christmas and would like to do something for me, then send some money to my paypal! I'd really appreciate it especially right now so I can at least try to get some gifts and such while I am over in England, and have a little bit of money when I get home in case I come home to a fucked up situation of some sort (very possible). My paypal addy is firstname.lastname@example.org. Thank you :>
Note to Commissioners: I apologize profusely for being so slow with artwork right now. As I mentioned before, I haven't been feeling quite right lately (I actually had another month long sick-fit around October where I was just puking constantly) and right now all I've been putting out is really quick doodles that aren't up to par to with my regular work and I refuse to half-ass my commission work to 'just get it done'. This has never been my policy. Once I come back from my vacation, I will attempt to get back on track with my commissions or, alternatively, if I'm still not well enough to work on anything, start attempting to issue refunds. I hope everyone understands. If you have any questions or concerns about this, feel free to note me.
Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Day Seven: Four things you want in a romantic partner.
Day Eight: Three of your favorite possessions.
Day Nine: Two images that describe your life or yourself right now.
Day Ten: One confession
I will do this all in one go because I will not be here in 10 days time so.
( learn all my secretzCollapse )
[10:44:19 AM] Lune (º✖º): there was some tv show where uhhhh
[10:44:24 AM] Lune (º✖º): this familys pet died
[10:44:26 AM] Lune (º✖º): i think a dog
[10:44:30 AM] Lune (º✖º): and they somehow put the dogs soul
[10:44:33 AM] Lune (º✖º): into this human head
[10:44:36 AM] Lune (º✖º): except it was just
[10:44:39 AM] Lune (º✖º): a decapitated human head
[10:44:43 AM] Lune (º✖º): with some of the lower jaw missing
[10:44:45 AM] Auwa: ew
[10:44:46 AM] Lune (º✖º): and it was talking
[10:44:54 AM] Lune (º✖º): and it somehow ended up in my fucking bathroom
[10:44:59 AM] Lune (º✖º): and i flushed it down the toilet
[10:45:05 AM] Auwa: lmfao
paul had made some peppermint creams the day before, so thats why i keep saying 'your peppermint'
also excuse the typos, im half asleep and i have a cut on the tip of a finger + i type like shit in the first place
[05:42] <Fiz> i had a dream about ur peppermint
[05:42] <paulMobile> omg lol
[05:42] <paulMobile> tell
[05:43] <Fiz> u werent even in it
[05:43] <Fiz> it was weird
[05:43] <Fiz> but i was in a mall and uh
[05:43] <paulMobile> h8
[05:43] <Fiz> you know the guy who mods oekakis
[05:43] <Fiz> waccoon
[05:43] <Fiz> was there for some reason
[05:43] <Fiz> and had a shop
[05:43] <Fiz> and said he had to close up because no one wants his magic or something
[05:44] <Fiz> he had a table outside the shopp full of bracelets
[05:44] <paulMobile> lmfao
[05:44] <Fiz> and inside the shop he had a bunch of blocks of soft peppermint candy
[05:44] <paulMobile> hehe
[05:44] <paulMobile> how do you know what they looked like
[05:45] <Fiz> and wac told me that i could have some of the stuff in the shop for discount
[05:45] <Fiz> just tell his retarded brother whos cashiering now
[05:45] <Fiz> i dont know what they look like
[05:46] <paulMobile> google peppermint cweam
[05:46] <Fiz> it wasnt peppermint cream
[05:46] <Fiz> it was just peppermint
[05:46] <Fiz> BUT IT WAS OBV FROM YOU
[05:46] <Fiz> anyways i got some of the peppermint and on the way out wac said
[05:46] <paulMobile> how >:o
[05:46] <Fiz> dont eat it on an empty stomach because it makes you insane
[05:47] <Fiz> because its peppermint
[05:47] <paulMobile> lmfao
[05:47] <paulMobile> ur so dum
[05:47] <Fiz> anyways i guess i was at the mall with some of my friends that i dont even know
[05:47] <Fiz> and they walked upt to me
[05:47] <Fiz> and were like
[05:47] <Fiz> OMG IM STARVING and started eating the peppermint
[05:47] <Fiz> i was like no stop
[05:48] <Fiz> this is gonna be some gremlins shit
[05:48] <Fiz> and they went nuts and got into a car and drove off
[05:48] <Fiz> and me and my dad
[05:48] <Fiz> had to chase them down
[05:49] <Fiz> they were driving their car on a railroad track
[05:49] <paulMobile> lmao
[05:49] <Fiz> and we some how got them to stob
[05:49] <Fiz> stop
[05:49] <Fiz> and we took them all to this literal hole in the wall
[05:49] <Fiz> that served taco bell
[05:49] <Fiz> it was just a hole and a guy gave you tacos
[05:49] <Fiz> and we asked for like
[05:50] <Fiz> a bunch of tacos and to use their phone
[05:50] <Fiz> the guy scooted the phoen to the edge of the hole
[05:50] <Fiz> but when i put my hand in to get the reciever
[05:50] <Fiz> the guy slammed the gate down on my hand
[05:50] <Fiz> and then i woke up
Rom for white. i dont have black yet
works fine. enjoy.
EDIT: actually no it doesnt work fine. the anti piracy is random freezing and NO EXP WHATSOEVER
edit 2: http://www.4shared.com/file/BtT4d2nB/b-p
patched white. exp works. idk about random freezing. just save often.
got dropped from my medical program because my shitty ass rheumatologist was all "oh she hasnt been here for an appointment we were supposed to have 3 months ago" WHAT APPOINTMENT? YOU NEVER TOLD ME OF ANYTHING. LAST TIME I WAS THERE YOU TOLD ME TO GET A BLOOD TEST BUT NEVER TOLD ME WHERE TO GO TO GET THE BLOOD TEST LOL. so the blood test never got done and no one ever told me to come in again. by the time i started feeling shitty again, my appt with the cancer doc was coming up so i could just talk to him??
so now they want me to get letters from both him and my old cancer doctor just because i saw him yesterday, even though they said that he (cancer doc) doesnt take this program as "payment" or whatever
okay i guess theres two other rheumatology clinics in the area. highly doubt any of the doctors there will basically take a charity case though
bitch on the phone wouldnt even give me a chance to gather my thoughts properly and just kept butting in before i could fully explain something
"WHY DIDNT YOU SEE THIS DOCTOR FOR 6 MONTHS"
"they never gave me an appointment, plus i had an appointment with my cancer doctor so i figured id bring up any concerns i had with him?"
"WHY WERE YOU SEEING THE CANCER DOCTOR"
"...because they thought i had cancer and its been scheduled for over 6 months for me to see him?"
"WELL WHY DO YOU THINK YOU SHOULD STILL BE ELIGIBLE"
"because im not healthy!?!?!?"
anyone who says america has the best healthcare in the world can go fucking eat the shit out of my asshole. you are wrong. this shouldn't be happening to anyone, but unfortunately this is common shit.
some of this cped from twitter
doctor wouldnt give me any pain meds :') this is my old cancer doctor. he said its up to the shithouse doctor to give me proper meds (the guy who said he doesnt prescribe pain meds [what a lie] and is a complete fucking quack)
then the business supervisor or w/e tried to harass me because i havent paid anything. "YOU'RE IGNORING ALL MY ATTEMPTS TO CONTACT YOU"
the guys only contacted us once, two weeks ago, saying "pay 500 bucks on your next visit". of course im going to ignore that lol
he tried to say he sent in a charity form and stuff and 4 other letters and WE NEVER GOT THEM and claimed that my attorney never contacted them. uh wrong, my attorney had to fucking contact every office to get all the bills and all my medical records so once i get on medicaid the bills would be covered. my dad pretty much made him shut up.
hopefully my dad can talk to my aunt and see if she can get me some lortab or something. i know her doctor will pretty much give her any pain meds at any time so it wouldnt be hard for her, but she can be a fucking bitch sometimes about this shit.
at least i got a big pretzel
HOPEFULLY MY BIRTHDAY ENDS UP BEING BETTER
im not gonna do anything special as usual, except watch the new House season premiere.
theres nothing i really want right now except pokemon toys i guess lol and gift art is always good enuff 4 me
22 is a dumb age
hi! for anyone that was interested in my pokemon collection, i posted it over here.
unfortunately i cant have just good news for once. my dads been working for his friend for a while to get some extra income. his friend just had to shut down his shop today :/ i hope hes okay and i hope we'll be okay. sigh.
forgot to post about this last night but heres the story
got a letter from my lawyer yesterday. it looks like ssi is ready to fucking carry on with my shit. hes asking for any medical records that id think would be "lost" (i cant think of any) and to try to get cooperation from any of my doctors to see if theyll like write out a letter or send their own personal recollections or something like that. its just good to get a letter from my lawyer after a few months of nothing.
unfortunately it looks like thats going to cancel the trip to england i was trying to plan for october. i just had a bad feeling they were going to start trying to actually do something with my case after months of nothing. oh well :(
also got a call from my medical project/program saying theyre ready to talk to me about extending my membership (for lack of better word). just gotta call them back sometime today
looks like its going to be a busy month. i go in for a blood test on the 7th, ct scan on the 9th and check up with my old cancer doc on the 14th. ill see if i can get him to send a letter to ssi (or to me so i could send it to them) and see if he could possibly hook me up with some pain medication, seeing as my current doctor wont. i dont know if he can or will, considering hes not my "primary doctor" anymore but it cant hurt to try i guess?
and then i have my dum ol birthday on the 20th. YUCK. im going to be 22. what kind of dumb age is that. i dont even know what i want for my birthday
omfg pokemon b/w on the 18th. im not going to import or anything but i hope hackers can figure out a way to crack the anti-piracy in the rom so i can play it. i think most of the new pokemon that have been released are kinda dumb looking but the game itself looks really good. i hope it is! N gives me a boner.
also holy shit, the new season of house airs on my birthday UGUU best birthday pres ever
health wise i dont know. i feel drugged up all the time even though im not taking any medication. probably because im sleeping really weird hours and barely ate anything lately. oops
i think im gonna try to post my pokemon collection over to pkmncollectors sometime this week, so ill be sure to xpost over here too.
oh yea and you guys should follow my tumblr because i post a lot of really great stuff there. and you can follow my twitter to watch me bitch about things lmfao. and then you can really answer me questions and itll be good.
AND HERES MY EGGS
okay i think im done pimping out all of my links now how are you
Bad Gremlin is the new Lady Gaga single, in ode to Michael Jackson and his recent passing.
In the music video, Lady Gaga is a Mogwai with ridiculous hair wearing her favorite Kermit the Frog fursuit. She sings about how it’s hard being the baddest gremlin around and how it’s time to take a vacation. She runs towards a swimming pool, ripping off her frog outfit and jumps in with a big splash.
She begins to scream in pain as five smaller Lady Gagas burst from her back. Four of them act like typical Lady Gaga fans, but one of the new mogwais has even more ridiculous hair-style (a multicolored mowhawk) than Lady Gaga does. She dubs herself the new, baddest gremlin around and calls herself ‘Stripey Poopoo’.
Lady Gaga is infuriated that the new mogwai says it’s badder than her. She conjures up a clever scheme to become the baddest again. There’s a short montage where all of the mogwais begin to do the dance from Michael Jackson’s Thriller while it cuts off and on to Lady Gaga sucking a horse’s dick. However, Stripey Poopoo is sucking a zebra’s dick. This is automatically considered more ‘bad’ than Lady Gaga’s attempt, which makes her even more angry.
She rushes into the house, slams open the refrigerator, and begins to microwave a pot pie, but not before injecting heroin into it (Michael Jackon’s favorite snack). As the microwave timer counts down, the clock on the wall also counts down to midnight. The timer beeps right as the clock hits a minute after midnight. She begins to devour the pot pie. She then goes into a cocoon like state and another montage kicks in. It pans towards the pool area and it shows that the five other mogwais are also in cocoons after they consume horse and zebra semen after midnight.
The house then explodes and Lady Gaga emerges, not as a mogwai or a gremlin, but as herself. The other gremlins begin to laugh at her, because she can’t be the baddest gremlin if she is not a gremlin. Lady Gaga smirks, lays down and spreads open her legs, causing a bright light to shine from her vagina onto the gremlins. The gremlins scream in pain as they begin to melt to death.
Lady Gaga gets up and stands over Stripey Poopoo’s melting body and stomps on it’s skull, causing its brains to shoot out into her open mouth. She licks the brains off her lips and winks to the audience. She is now the baddest gremlin again.
3:17 PM - Lune (ºxº): i had a dream about zeriara
3:17 PM - Lune (ºxº): again
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): i dont even know
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): my dreams were fucking weird all night
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): lmfao
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): like
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): i was running some art thing
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): but
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): the submissions
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): were uh
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): a mail slot
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): in my backyard
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): and she wasnt allowed to enter
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): but she kept sneaking in
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): and putting drawings in the art slot
3:18 PM - Lune (ºxº): as other people
3:19 PM - Lune (ºxº): and i kept catching her
3:19 PM - Lune (ºxº): and i was like
3:19 PM - Lune (ºxº): ZER
3:19 PM - Lune (ºxº): YOU FUCKING RETARD
3:19 PM - Lune (ºxº): STOP IT
3:19 PM - Lune (ºxº): I KNOW ITS YOU I CAN SEE YOUR IP
3:19 PM - Lune (ºxº): (????)
3:19 PM - Lune (ºxº): and she kept thinking she was very clever when she wasnt
3:21 PM - Lune (ºxº): i also had a dream
3:21 PM - Lune (ºxº): that
3:21 PM - Lune (ºxº): like
3:21 PM - Lune (ºxº): i was on a field trip
3:21 PM - Lune (ºxº): but
3:21 PM - Lune (ºxº): my current age with my old 4th grade class
3:21 PM - Lune (ºxº): all 20-21 year olds
3:21 PM - Lune (ºxº): to some wildlife preserve
3:22 PM - Lune (ºxº): and some kind packed an extra set of clothes
3:22 PM - Lune (ºxº): and we stole them
3:22 PM - Lune (ºxº): and put them on a dog carcass
3:22 PM - Lune (ºxº): and the police thought it was actually a dead person
3:22 PM - Lune (ºxº): even though it was obviously a dog
3:23 PM - Lune (ºxº): and there was a big blank area in between tht and the school bus dropping me off at my house
3:24 PM - Lune (ºxº): and i had a big bag of candy and a bottle of red gatorade
3:24 PM - Lune (ºxº): and there was some creepy ice cream guy behind my house
3:26 PM - Lune (ºxº): creepy icecream guy was like EW CANDYS BAD FOR YOU HAVE THIS SLUSHIE and it looked bad so i was like no
3:26 PM - Lune (ºxº): hes like FUCKING TAKE IT!!!! and i poured the gatorade on him and he melted
3:28 PM - Lune (ºxº): then morty was on my yard looking kawaii and had a boner out and i was like geeze man
3:29 PM - Lune (ºxº): i dont remember what happened then
unemployment offices saying my dad isnt eligible for any more money when hes supposed to be uhg
i hope its a mistake but i dont know.
air conditioner still on the fritz too.
life sucks lol